So I’ve blogged about my weight before and I will blog about it again right now. I still don’t understand the way my mind works. I went to the doctor today and she told me that I really need to lose weight or I am in HIGH risk of diseases. What do I do when I get home? BINGE! BINGE! BINGE! It makes no sense at all! I really need to lose weight! If I keep this up, I’ll be 200lbs by next month or something! I can’t have that! I’m really scared of diseases and I don’t want a disease to be my eye opener! I’m not sure what I can do. I don’t know how I’m going to start this.. But I really need to start exercising! And pronto! No more excuses! No more binge eating! I literally feel like a dead weight just sitting on my bed typing this right now. I can’t be happy as long as I’m this heavy. OBESE! O fckn BESE! I’m only 5’2 too! My BMI is off the hook! It’s like 35 or something when it’s suppose to be under 25. How am I gonna do that?! I told myself that I was going to try and motivate myself to lose weight but I guess it’s just not working. It’s honestly making me feel depressed. I hate going to parties and being super shy to talk to anyone that I don’t know because I’m afraid they won’t talk to me cus I’m FAT! My mother and I are going to the PI in May and I really don’t want to hear the shit my family is going to say about my weight. I have 3 months to improve! I know I’m not gonna lose that much in 3 months, but at least some type of improvement will do! C’mon self! Wake the fck up and start eating right and exercising! It is NOT okay to be OBESE. I will fit into just a Large or Medium again! Slowly but surely! This ends today!
Please God. Help me… Push me. Give me that motivation that I am looking for.
Please.
